I just need to be comforted.
I need to be told it's safe.
I need someone to not walk away.
To not emotionally detach when I am too much.
To understand how scared I feel, all of the time.
To understand how I don't trust others,
even when logically they are trustworthy.
I need someone to stay.
To not leave over a phone call.
To not turn ice cold when I already feel stuck.
To not turn away when I need them by my side.
Not knowing who to confide in.
Not knowing if any decision I make is right.
Not trusting myself.
Trying, trying, trying to advocate for myself.
To not give up just because it'd be easier.
I think of every consequence, every effect,
until I am a shell of a human being.
Until I am living for everyone else,
except myself.
