I've been depressed since seventh grade
I hope that soon my life will fade
the first time I picked up a knife
I finally liked my life
my blade is there whenever I'm in need
When I'm upset I do the deed
I fear for my life
when I use my knife
I can't feel the pain
the pain that keeps me from going insane
I can't feel the hurt that I should
but I really wish I could
I can't feel when I carve into my skin
I know that I can never win
Pain is numb to me
Why can't it just let me be
I can tell I have no heart
I just feel torn apart
One day it will all become too much
my pain builds up a whole bunch
I continue to inflict harm upon me
I wish it would just let me be
I hate myself for ridding myself this way of my pain
but this hate is what keeps me from going insane
All I want in this life
Is to give up on this strife
If I hold my breath and close my eyes
I won't let myself cry
I don't cry when I slice
because its the only way I control my life
