it would have been better if you added more words to make it flow better, no offense

really nice poem!!! i liked it!!! i flowed very well and it was very powerful!

I agree the flow was a lil choppy, maybe it's not the words so much but the style meaning instead of have 2 lines a verse have 4 or have one big one because it makes each 2nd sentence very abrupt and breaks up the flow, also if you one line has 5 words for example make the next not to long say have a make of 8 words because that'll also improve the flow! Moving onto the content though, it was very well written and beautiful, now combine it with flow and you'll have a ReAl KicK-aSs poem:)

Awwwww thats soooo sweet. I wish you two the best of luck. I hope I get that lucky someday, still trying to find the right guy for myself right now. You're really lucky to have someone that you love and love you back like that. Its a great poem and I love it so I gave it a 5/5. Keep doing good. If you ever need help on anything you can always ask me. :-)
Love
Kala Dearing