That girl

*this isn't actually a poem, I'm just writing this randomly, with no main idea, just words, and it will probably suck, but i don't really care*

everyday
is just another day
that i waste
sitting here crying
all these useless tears
all these wasted breaths
until i just can't
until there's no more
no more tears to shed
no more breaths to breathe
I'm just so lost
so unknown
so alone
maybe I'm not even really here
so much pain
so much love
and no one to give it to
no one to blame it on
except myself
all alone
and so lonely
even while your here
telling me not to fear
i love you
but i don't love
just like i don't care
and my heart isn't in pieces
I'm dead
on the inside
tired on the outside
faking so much
all this happiness
all these smiles
cos you don't see my tears
what do i feel
do i feel at all
am i even here
a question
I've asked too many times
fear
of being invisible
but wishing that i was
for than i wouldn't get hurt
or maybe thats invincible
no more pain
no more fear
no more tears
can i cry now?
or do i have to be strong
missing you
its been too long
too much pain
there is a girl
i know so well
who hates herself
and you too
her self esteem
does not exist
just like her
in her mind
she is insane
lost
crazed
do you know her?
probably not
no one does
no one sees her
but that girl
is me