The Broken Down Tears

A life ever so wasted-
happiness never quite tasted.
what's new in hell
that wouldn't hurt as much as the experiences she could tell...

salty tears,
bleeding down
from the windows of her soul...
look inside for a loving heart,
but all you'll see is a cold one, dark as coal.
what kind of ana failure am i? friend? daughter? person? I just wanna crawl into a corner and cry till my tears have washed away all my sorrow. Each day brings a new light, and yet a new fear, a new struggle to overcome, one more thing taking away the one thing I want...when will it end? must I end for it to end? I hope not, I want to live, I just want to be thin, thin and loved....and if that goal is unattainable then I don't know...
how could anyone love
someone so confused,
so trapped in a cycle of self-inflicted pain,
someone who has never once thought that life
ever provided anything for her to gain.
When will it end...will I ever have a true friend? One who understands...me...jamie, accept me and all my attachments....