Because Of Me

You could be dead
But I’m not sure yet
Still you live on
Only in my mind I see
That you are my everything

All is lost because I couldn’t find
Here I stand just losing my mind
Wishing I could disappear
Only waiting for you to reappear
To be with me here

I could be dead
Lying in my bed
With no one by my side
Because I never tried

All I can see is the fire
It took my life
It built me strife
Only to hold on to at the edge of my seat
But I begin to fall, as I am weak

I am tangled
It feels like I’m being strangled
My life has taken the wrong course
I should have never even forced

I made you believe I was okay
But now I have to pay
I need you here as I lay
To tell you my lies
As tears swell in my eyes

I feel so controlled
I’m sorry you were not told
But as I begin to unfold
I want you to know
This was not a show

Everything got so complicated
At home, my parents.
At school, my friends.
You.
My life.

More beatings, more shouts
I couldn’t take it anymore I had to get out.

Fighting and losing
I couldn’t take anymore choosing.

Worrying if it were me you would defy
I couldn’t take the heartbreak another time.

My life.

Everything I have lost, nothing left to gain
But one thing I have to lose.
Without thinking and not knowing what else to do,
I must do this
There is not a thing I can fix.

I ended my life
To stop my strife
I thought you were brave
That you would get over me
I?m sorry I never knew

I shot myself with one bullet
When you heard,
You didn?t believe.
But you found me
Lying on the ground.

It was too late.
If I could rewind
Maybe I could find
How much you really cared
But now it wasn’t fate.

You couldn’t deal
You thought you would never heal
It was me you missed
Nothing could change this
Because I was gone

You were confused
But it didn’t mean it was the end of your life, too
I should’ve explained
Now it’s too late
Because of me the pain is still remained

I should have known
You should have told me
I should have asked
Now with me gone and now you
What in this world are we going to do?
Now our friends will suffer your death, too.
Because of me.