The Extent of My Existance

I can’t believe this is the extent of my existence
I hate it with passion and am so against it with insistence
This is really why I am hear, my divine calling or purpose
It makes me so depressed I couldn’t imagine anything worse…

Everyday working for the rest of my inevitable life
Never achieving it all and forever having to sacrifice
I’ll always be striving to meet my goals
Eternally searching for that missing piece of my soul…

Those repetitive task day after painful day
It saddens me so much that in reality it’ll always be this way
Getting up in the morning, my to-do list seems endless
When did I stop enjoying it and everything become such a mess…

When did that childhood innocence start and real life actually start?
I think growing up over these years has taken a major toll on my heart
I’m just so exhausted and that fire has somewhat died
I’ve lost count of how many million tears I’ve cried…

Like a vicious fight, with my hands tied behind my back
I’ll never break free and I have to learn to accept that fact
Always short of breath, there is never sufficient air
I’ve let go of my hope and that willingness to care…

I’m extremely frustrated with myself from within
I want to I need to escape from this square I’m trapped in
At times I simply wish I wasn’t here that I was dead
But then I convince myself and push that idea out of my head…

I couldn’t do it my loved ones of too myself
But at the same time I’m stuck in a situation that can’t be helped
What else is left for me to try?
With this being the extent of my existence, I can’t help but cry…