My old man's a dustman,
He wears a dustman's hat,
He bought two twopenny tickets,
To watch a football match.
The ball was in the centre,
The referee's whistle blew,
Skinny passed to fatty,
Fatty passed to skinny,
Skinny passed to fatty and not knocked the goalie scatter!
"Where was the goalie when the ball was in the net?"
"Halfway round the goalpost with his trousers round his neck!"
Singing, "Royal Britannia,
marmalade and jam,
Three pork sausages for my ole man.
My uncle Sydney's got trouble with his kidneys,
Put them on a flannel and send them down the channel...
