Haunted Soul (part 1)

by vanessarrr   Sep 17, 2004


That old gray clock arrived at twelve,
I knew then I must save myself.
From what crazed thing? I should've known.
I had to ask… I should've flown.

That booming lightning, signs of doom
Matched with the darkness in my room.
With these, I should've figured out
That somewhere, something was about.

That form emerged in a long white gown.
She never seemed to touch the ground.
The glow of lightning met her face
And bared her bloody piercing gaze.

That livid face looked back at me.
With eyes that stare, 'though they can't see.
Expressionless, I heard their call
For me to meet a restless soul.

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  • 20 years ago

    by Jacki

    OOHH i really liked this, I seen you had a ghost series as do I so I had to read it. I'm all about these type of poems lol. Anyways I love how you made it rhyme i usually write free verse so this was really nice to read something on a simiular note but different. I liked the style of it and I loved the descriptions of the lighning hitting her face. Can't wait to go onto the next one :)

  • 20 years ago

    by pinkalias

    "And bared her bloody piercing gaze" i really like that line. ill be honest, the first two stances were weak, but i really liked the imagery on the last stance, good job

  • 20 years ago

    by Bryce Ellner

    Oooo, ghostie story! My favorite ^_^. Sorry I havent been on for a while to check your poetry. I'm well, how about yourself? Anyway, I think I'm going to like this little series. I have a neat little picture in my head of all this happening. Take care~

    --Bryce~

  • 20 years ago

    by Rachael/7MidniteTears

    excellent poem, i felt it, you are on my favorites. very good work, keep it up

  • 20 years ago

    by Nefarius

    boa, great and with that really good style, yezz and you're just 13 , don't loose that dark path, pleaze ;)

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