She no longer lives?

Heart broken head ache ...
I sleep inside, outside I'm awake
Tears fall with nobody to catch them but me
I cry like mad but, nobody must see

I need to keep it inside...i tell you I'm glad
On the inside it hurts mixed emotions angry yet sad
I bleed.. I'm bleeding... outside and in
My heart is broke, and so is my skin

Blood falls.. my wrist it cries...
Exposing it's hurt, revealing the lies
I lied to myself i lied to you
I lived in a lie a life untrue

But, i wasn't aware my mind wasn't working
My heart fell hard , you made it stop hurting
That one little moment brief second in time
Turned me into a fool that believes life changing lies

Your name once like candy .. now a knife
Taking my flesh and hugging it tight
Absorbing my blood withing your thick silvery blade
Taking all that i have....all my secrets..down to the grave

Sweet blood..oh how i love thee
Brought me to salvation..Now in pain on my knees
Blood it is you so rich and clean which makes a heart live
A heart..so deceiving causing me to do things.. i wish i never did

Take me O Lord i ask no longer to live another day
Sunshine makes me hurt darkness brings pain...
She is dead.......her resurrection or my death i ask you to do
Bring back the butterfly.....Or let me come home to you