Torn

I never got the chance,
To hold you in my arms.
I never got to hear you laugh,
Or keep you safe from harm.

Although at first I was afraid,
I admit my heart was torn.
I soon came to love you,
Before you were even born.

Then your mother slipped and fell,
And miscarried your little life.
All my anguish, pain and grief,
Cut me like a knife.

I never thought I wanted kids,
To say I did would be untrue.
But from the very bottom of my heart,
My precious baby, I did love you.

I'm writing this poem for you,
Just to say goodbye.
You will always be in my heart,
In a place you cannot die.

My ex girlfriend miscarried our baby when I was 19. This poem has taken a long time to be written down. Any comments would be greatly appreciated.