All I can do

I hate it
This love
I want to forget it ever happened
I want to never have known it
For it hurts too much.

This love, I wish it never existed
Lost in time, never in history

Time, and time again
I feel the pain of unreturned love.
But this is worse
It was returned once.
Returned with all one's heart
And then ceased, stopped.

Worse, you don’t seem to care
Could not give a damn,
Because you’re happy as it is.
As you should be,
And it seems that's without me.

Because you don’t care if I don’t care
You don’t notice if I don’t notice you.
You're indifferent to my indifference.
Nothing would change, if I did nothing.

The lost is love in a way
In the way that it feels secondary.

I always wonder
Will she treat our love?
Like this forever?
Always last,
Never first?

Will she ever change?
Why would she?
It’s working for her.
Her indifference is stunning.
Her priorities are dumbfounding.
The now is overwhelming.

Anything she sees, will be first
Before our love. Anything, anyone
Make her jump to her feet, and run
But not for me, I’m just always there.
It's no fun.