Why do i just suddenly feel so lost and hurt?
why?
maybe It's because I'm sick of hiding behind this stupid
coat of paint. I put on a show for everyone else, but
thats not me, the real me is inside screaming and crying
for hours at a time.
all everyone sees is a happy go lucky sophomore, with more
friends than she can keep track of...
but the real her just wants to curl up in a ball and end
it all.
you have no idea how much it hurts to have no one see the
real me, i try and act like myself but i get these looks
from everyone i know, they don't say anything out loud.
but i can see in their faces them going "what the hell is
she doing?" so i laugh it off, and pretend i was just
being weird, inside I'm crying Uncontrollably, screaming
because again i refused to face the looks and act like myself.
so day after day, and night after night i pray to God that
it will all end somehow. somehow i will just fall asleep
at night and not wake up to my alarm in the morning, that
somehow It'll be just a bad dream.
but until that day comes, I'll struggle through each day
and pray that it all ends soon.
