Wondering All The Time

I Wonder Allot Sometimes
Why In The Mornings I Awake
Thinking Of All The Strength
That I Know It Will Always Take

I Wonder Why I Live Today
I'm Sure I Should Be Dead
Suicide Is Supposed To Work
With Nothing To Be Said

Sometimes I Actually Wish
He Was A Rapist Like Them All
Wishing He'd Killed Me After
Instead Of Leaving Me To Fall

People Say I'm So Strong
That Iv Survived So Much
So Proud I Didn't Give Up
Just Bullshit And Such

I Only Keep On Leaving
Because I'm Afraid Of The Knife
It Used To Be My Best friend
Here To End My Life

But It Seems To Always Fail
And The Scars Then Show
Covering Up My Wrists Like This
Everywhere I Seem to Go

Ive Seen People Look At Them
Like They Make Them Sick
Well I Really Couldn't Care
I Always Get Out Of There Quick

I Always Hate This Wondering
I Wouldn't If I Was Dead
Theres The Final Decision
Nothing More To Be Said