Comments : Dead

  • 20 years ago

    by UM

    My insides are hollow; filled with strife.
    But now it's time to end my life.
    You could suggest an alternative instead,
    But it's too late, I'm already...Dead.

    Thats my little ending for ya! Kinda cheery doncha think? Feel free to use it if you like it or change it or whatever. Keep up the good work.

  • 20 years ago

    by Ashleigh

    thanx!

  • 20 years ago

    by Idiosyncratic

    pretty good poem, especially when read in your head, but when you read it aloud there are some parts that could be improved; like when you put:

    I feel so useless
    And also sad,

    instead of and also sad, you could put

    I feel so useless
    I feel so sad

    or

    I feel so useless
    And all so sad

    that's really the only part that needed improving, in my opinion, anyways, don't change if anything if you like it the way it is, great job with your poem!