Why can’t anyone understand?
That I am no more than a simple, sabulous, grain of sand?
Left to look up at all these magnificent boulders?
My souls burnt away and gone up in smolders
All I am is one obscure grain
Burning under god’s demonic sunlight
Giving all other creatures life
Yet condemning me to burn away
Leaving me alone with my pain
Why can’t anyone understand?
That I’m nothing more than a concoction fabricated from all the bullshit people say?
The clouds that cover the breath taking blue and replace it with a ghastly gray
The gray color of the soul-tearing thunderstorm
The gray color that consumes a broken child s face in an orphanage dorm
Forcing the neighborhood dogs to howl
Turning the pure atmosphere into bitter sweet and foul
Bitter sweet like lemons
Fictitious like fierce gremlins
Stuck in this corner like the hidden emotions stuck behind an “innocent†child’s eyes
Speaking to myself and imagining things in my head,
Like manic depression implies.
Never sinning in my life, yet condemned to depression of such a great degree
While another sinning murderer gets let out free.
Why can’t anyone understand?
That I have as little choice as a glamorous bird confined in a tiny aviary
They think I can escape, but I’m practically on a contract of slavery
They say, “it’s your fault that you do what you do!â€
Can’t they see that life doesn’t slow down, and so I have no chance of pushing through?
My family was always like an impaired, blue vase
Always blue yet always detained hidden cracks and faults
My life had always been an improperly built house
Always trying to get through, yet it’s missing bricks and bolts
People understand me less than they understand terrorists
My spirits been lost and forgotten just like an unopened Christmas gift
No one ever knows what to think of me, as if I’m some kind of thing to stare and point at
I’m trodden over so easily, just as if I were a “Welcome Home†door mat.
My two blue eyes are like a broken T.V set
They’re meant to show something more than a blank expression
Meant to show a story of happiness, depression or regret
I feel like a clown’s novelty, shaped balloons
Took so much effort to make, but it will shrink and die just as soon
I feel like a painted portrait of a late family member
It’s still there, but that doesn’t mean there’s a soul behind the shadings that try to catch the original persons temper
I am so similar to a frosted window
As you look through, you expect to see all that lies to the other side
But you must watch closely to see anything happen or grow
I feel like I’m kept inside a bubble
But as I don’t have a pin, I’m in a spot of trouble.
It is I almost as if I am that unknown character, concocted for that single painting
Or a speck of salt dropped into a glass of water, quickly disintegrating.
I am that incredible song that has not and never will earn a record deal
I am a robot made to appear and act like a human, yet not feel
But more than anything else,
I am that big oak tree that lives at the top of that grassy hill
I stand alone,
I never
Ever
No matter how long I stand here,
I will never succumb to the fierce whether
I will never whither and fall
For the rest of eternity, I will stand proud and tall.
