My Final Sorry

I Look In Their Eyes
And You Know What I See
A Horrible Clear Refection
Of What I Seem To Be

I See Into My Mother
And Cant Help But Cry
Its Been So Long Now
She Can No Longer Try

She Saved Me From The Knife
From The Cut After Cut
And As Life Always Goes
Theres Always A But

She Cant Kill The Dreams
The Tears That Flow At Night
And Like Every Single Mother
She Cant Make Everything Alright

I See All The Pain
That She Had To Live Through Me
I Wish Sorry Was Enough
To Finally Set Her Free

I Know That Night Wasn't My Fault
That Rape Just Happens To Some
But Because I Told,They Suffer
I Just Never Meant To Hurt You Mum

Then I Look Into My Big Brothers Eyes
And I'm Not Sure How To Feel
Life Was Never Fair On Him
Gave Him Way Too Much To Deal

And I Made The Cards Worse
Caused Way To Much Stress
Becoming A Drop Out Like This
But People Never Expected Less

I Made A Job Ruining Lives
Because I Had A Bad Turn In Life
He Suffered Every Single Moment
Every time I Cried To That Knife

If I Could Change The Past
Id Never Have Let Them Tell Him That Day
He Was Never A Failure To Me
Hes My Only Hero Id Forever Say

Then I Look At Those Two
Their Only Just A Year Apart
If Only I Could Show Them
Their Every Part Of My Heart

They Were Way Too Young Know
How Bad I Was After That Night
Even Though They Try And Try
To Help Me Win This Fight

I'm Sorry They Had To Watch
As I Slipped Day After Day
They Just Could Never Know
What To Do Or Say

I Wish Sorry Was Fair Enough
For Making Them Watch My Life Fall
Watching My Pain Affect Everyone Else
Leaving Them With Not Much At All

Then I See The Little One
Singing About A Spider On The Spout
Waiting For A Applause From Me
Proving He Knows What Its All About

I Could Never Owe Him Enough
For Saving Me With His Smile
Seeing Him Playing every Day
Made Life Just Worth Wild

He Was A Tiny Little Angel
That Came From Heavens Call
He Made Everyone Fly Again
When We Started To Fall

I wish He Knew What Sorry Was
But I Know i Couldn't Explain
I Hope He Never Has To Know
Or Watch Me Go Through Pain

I Wish Sorry Was Good Enough
For Every Single One
They Dealt With All My Pain
And Then even Some

But I Failed Them All
I Just Cant Get Better
So All My Little Sorries
Concealed In This Letter

I Wish God Could Tell Them
Long After I Say Goodbye
Tell Them To Be Proud Again
The Day I Learn To Fly

I Wish I Could Erase This Year
Give Them What They Gave Me
Some Kind Of Glimpse Of Love
And Then Maybe They'd See

I Never Stopped Crying
Because I Didn't Catch Their Fall
I Tore Apart My Own Life
When God Dealt His Call

I Played This Stupid Victim
Because I Was To Weak To Fight
I Made Them All Suffer
Because Of That Night

I Shouldve Kept That Secret
Saved Them All From Pain
Looked For Comfort Somewhere Else
Instead Of Causing Rain

If Sorry Could Give Them Wings
Id Do It Five Times And More
If I Thought Flying Would Save Them
Id Let Them All Sore

And If I Could Do All This
If I Could Only Make It Better
Id Do It All Right Now
Instead Of Writing A Worthless Letter.....