In My Brother's Eyes*~*

In my brother's eyes I was a hero,
I can't see why he thought that either.
One night my parents and I had a huge fight

In my brother's eyes he thought everything would be all right.
But I had to leave, get some fresh air
I went with my friends,
we went to my cabin

In my brother's eyes he knew something was wrong,
all I can remember
are the words "I dare"
that's all I could hear,
but I didn't care,
they handed me the gun,
I had no clue what for,
then they said do it,
so I put it to my head.
After I pulled the trigger
I lied there on the ground.
As they put me in the box
all I hear is my mom screaming why
and my dad sitting there about to die.

In my brother's eyes I was no longer a hero,
I hear my mom reassuring herself with the words is just a prank over and over again,
Until the day of my wake,
she no longer thought it was fake.
As they laid me in my coffin 6 feet under,
I see an angel she calls my name,
I ask her please to take away my brother's pain
she asked me why just him
I said because he looks up to me
And I know for a fact,
that now to my baby brother I am just an act.
please God, oh please God make the suffering stop,
as I say goodbye while walking on the trail,
I'm sorry baby brother for my horrible betrayal.

In my brother's eyes after I am gone
my brother can no longer bare it,
he thinks that what I did is okay for him to do as well.
So as I look down at him,
from up in heaven,
I know that its my fault,
if only he didn't look up to me,
I wouldn't be watching him draw nearer and nearer to the vault.
As the wind blows,
that's a signal of me breathing upon you,
under the tree is the shelter from me,
the music in the meadow,
made by the crickets,
is me telling you
its okay now
When the rain falls
that is me crying
hoping you will quit trying
Please baby brother, please don't do it
look at mom and dad
look how hard it is for them to get through it.

In my brother's eyes,
I have failed to accomplish
being the hero.

{ Please comment this is a poem for our best friend his brother commited suicide 2 years ago and he is having a hard time with it so plz comment}