Fill my cup...

by Kaitlin Kristina   Nov 30, 2004


I hold my knife against my skin,
Quivering I begin to stick it in,
Draw it across and let out a deep breath,
The tears start to pour,
*Gasp*, call forward death.

I could easily end it all right now,
Draw the knife back,
And let the blood fall,
I lick my tear strewn, salted lips,
Close my eyes,
Think of your kiss.

Im sick and tired of being sad,
Giving myself, and then being had,
Life is just too much for me,
It’s just not what I need it to be.

I pull the blade back,
Slit again, the blood flows,
Staining light skin.

No one will miss me,
No one will care,
There’s no point in screaming,
No one can hear.

I reach for a washcloth,
Press it to my wrist,
Close my eyes,
Hold it with fist,

I let the pain just soak me up,
Over take me,
Fill my cup.

I am drifting away now,
I’m starting to fade,
Never to regret the decision I’ve made.

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Latest Comments

  • 19 years ago

    by Arthur

    i feel like that sometimes, no i'm not ganan commit cuicide lol

  • 20 years ago

    by Kaitlin Kristina

    Hey Aaron. To answer your question (which was a good one, by the way), I reach for the washcloth because it soaks up the blood, symbolically and in reality. Its not necessarily about regret, but it is about soaking up pain, filling a void, just draining yourself of everything and letting yourself go. In many ways its like the washcloth is sucking regret and pain, depression and resentments.
    Thanks for asking.
    With love, K. Kristina

  • 20 years ago

    by Knight_of_Blackrose

    Very well done, lovely structure and flow. I only have one queation, if you would have no regrets (in the writing) then why did you grab a wash cloth? Was it to stop the bleeding or was the washcloth something more symbolic?

  • 20 years ago

    by Kaitlin Kristina

    Thanks guys. I have a very destructive nature so writing about this stuff keeps me from doing it most of the time.

  • 20 years ago

    by callie

    its awesome. lifes a bi*ch... it totally sux. you gotta keep going though. keep writing! your very talented!

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