hi jess- i can see from your point of view. If it's any help you can talk to me as i dont know you and i wont judge you. i can se from your poems that you have had a lot of bad experiences, please talk to someone they can help. i have not been through some of the terrible experiences that you have been through but i can say that i grew up with an abbusive alcoholic dad. I too wanted the world to end and tried to die many times by slitting my wrists and overdosing. I found it easier talking to someone. i'm not saying forget it and put on a brave face because i know that you canot forget it. please dont end your life- i've said my bit- and i think you are a talented poet- please remember that if you need to talk i'm always here to listen 2 you. take care now, luv sarah x