Yes, I Cry...

People don’t know it,
But, yes, I cry.
People assume I don’t,
But they are wrong,
Know why?

Just because I take a deep breath,
I hold them back, but I hurt in depth.
Just because I perform under pressure,
Doesn’t mean I can take stress of endless measure.

When I get upset, I say I don’t care,
Inside I am tearing out my hair,
When someone hurts me really bad,
I act and pretend like I’m not at all sad.

I know all the right things to say,
How to appear put together in every way.
Independent, mature, and strong,
These people, that think that of me,
Are wrong.

I cry all the time,
Either inside or out,
Inside are echoing endless shouts.
Outside façade is strong and fixed,
Never fazed,
Like pain don’t exist.

They think I am well adjusted,
I say I am mal-equipped
To handle nearly the stress I’m dealing with.

Being the go-to for every person,
Taking care of everyone leads to excursion,
Being an emotional rock for all,
Takes a toll to the point you cant walk, but crawl.

I am independent,
Raised myself,
Dad too busy generating wealth,
Mom too pre-occupied with spending it all,
Brother and sister too drugged up to call.

I tell stories of when I was young,
People are astonished at the stuff my family has done,
Live in nannies since I was born,
Never disciplined, never scorned.
This may seem like a dream come true,
But it’s far from that, I can explain to you.

Left alone to fend for myself,
Emotionally and mentally sat on the shelf,
No one to love me,
No one to care,
Rebellious streak and nature were there.

So here I am, 16 years old.
Fed up with life, alone and cold.
Depressive, yet no one understands why.
I may claim not too, but yes, I cry.

So strong, independent, secure and well mannered,
The mask fits perfectly; it’s just the standard.
You swallow your pain,
Sweep away fears,
Yet it all comes out in a plethora of tears.

The next time you see me take a deep breath,
Look into my blue eyes and take a check,
I will most likely evade your glance,
There is no way I will take the chance,
To show you a hint of the real me,
Broken and lonely, just let me be.

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