Waiting For Happiness

Are feelings supposed to leave you forever?
Are they allowed to get up and leave on any random day?
Well, something has happened that I didn’t think ever would,
Depression moved in and made Happiness go away.

I now see everything as if it’s a big gray blur.
Depression has shown me things I never wanted to know,
And it has told me things I never wanted myself to hear.
It has shown me to release my pain by letting blood flow.

I try to think past all these dark thoughts and images,
And I remember a time that was nothing like this.
When I could call Happiness to me whenever I wanted,
And when I didn’t make the blood flow from my wrists.

I remember a time when Happiness was always there.
When Happiness would never ever let me feel down.
When I could think happy thoughts and erase all my fear.
But, now, Happiness is lost, and I can’t think behind this constant frown.

I wish I could find my dear lost Happiness,
But this overflowing Depression never lets me.
It says that I’m better off dead, without my feelings.
It tells me to take a razor and set myself free.

I wish it would go away, and let Happiness come back.
That way I wouldn’t have to remember the days when I was able to smile.
Those days would come rushing back to me, and I could live like I used to.
When everything made sense and everything about life was worth while.

I know that once you have met Depression it is hard to part from it.
But I am trying my best to turn my back and walk away.
While walking away, I will be even more empty, but hoping,
Hoping that maybe, Happiness will come back to me someday.