This cant be life

This cant be life
when I'm living in this struggle
why cant anything be rite?
Always getting into trouble
but this cant be solved by the knife
i could end everything in just one swipe

but no i don't i wont and never will
i will not not slit my wrists, to watch my blood spill
No,
instead i will keep climbing up what seems to be a never ending hill
and though i can barely bare it
I still will not pop pills
I will not sniff lines to get a Lil thrill
I will not be getting drunk every day till my head spins like a wind mill

Been there done that i say
too much fun for so many debts i still have to pay

I suffered so did close ones
But i didn't care they didn't matter anymore
all that did was if i could get my next fix
On me- my own mind playing tricks
now that i think about it i get sick

But from my mistakes I learn
now i got a job, respect, money, that i all earned
I'm out of that game
its game over, except I won
and i will walk with no shame
I conquered when i came
I admit at first its all fun
but believe me not in the long run

so when Ur out there doing Ur drugs getting drunk having head spins
remember that in this game of reality not everyone wins