When you loose your best friend

When the only thing you have from your childhood is a friend,
that you shared all your good times with.
A friend that you grew up with,
a friend that you shared everything with.
Then one Christmas morning your mom tells you that they have died.
How do you react to that?
Do your cry?
Do you say well thats ok I'll find a new best friend and pass them by?
No you just sit there in shock,
as your mother tells you how it was for the best and that they were suffering so much.
Not that she knows how much he meant to me.
Not knowing that my only friend that i loved so dear is now deceased.
That all my loneliness inside forgotten by the passing of the friend.
The friend who can no longer lend a hand, the oldest friend, I've ever had.
Now i don't know how to act,
i don't know what to feel,
i don't know what to do.
There's nothing i feel that would be appropriate to the occasion of this, all i can do is sit here in awe, and misery, of never seeing him again.
rest in peace my friend, and have a pleasant after life