Ha, Ouch

by Sean Allen   Jan 2, 2005


Now that I feel
this way, is it okay
if I spill my blood
on the paper?
(If reading on-line
then forgive my error,
I'll do what I can...
"Spatter in a
sanguinary manner
all over those
electronic bits and bytes.")

Okay here is the problem.
I guess it's alright
that we never have to fight
because we love so much.
But every time you say "no,"
(although every now and
then you say it rightfully so!)
I feel like I'm fighting
a civil war.
And for every word I
don't say to you
another soldier on
the side of my
self-interest dies
and so the demise
of myself has come true
my wants have become
submersed by
the needs and desires
of my most precious:
you.

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by Natalie

    My wants have become
    submersed by
    the needs and desires
    of my most precious:
    you.
    ``````````````````````
    I liked that part. =)

    ..I thought this was gonna be a funny poem, 'Ha, Ouch' sounded pretty funny.. But yeah. Lol.. I didn't really undertand the first stanza. It was still pretty good though. Better then the poems I gave you to read. Lol.. 5/5

    `Taleee. xx.

  • 19 years ago

    by SuperJenius

    not your best but still awesome
    ~HazE

  • 19 years ago

    by FTS Miles

    This seems to be the way of the relationship... especially when the caring is intense. Hard to find the balance between cherishing of them and cherishing of self. (Good luck.)

  • 19 years ago

    by Lance Hardy

    I agree with Aken that its a good poem, although the first stanza is kinda weird I liked the second one. You expressed yourself quite clearly and if somethings up, we can talk, although I may not be able to help much since I'm inexperienced.

  • 19 years ago

    by Aken Sol

    I disagree with pink :-/
    I thought it's awesome, and sometimes, poetry is to express one's feelings and ease angst. This isn't just some words slabed together for the hell f it. It's filled with strong desires, confusion, and self-torment. Just the emotions expressed subtly through this piece is enough to make it a great poem. Good job Sean. Cal me if you wanna talk :-)

    Aken Sol

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