Hatred it all I really feel.
Pain inside my inner shell,
It’s keeping me so real,
Hurting all my feelings deep,
Cut my skin away with steel,
It’s the only way I’m sure I’m still here…
I’m real…
So tell me friend, pal, buddy, mate,
What do you see?
Have I become what you wanted me to be?
A dirty and worthless child,
Descending into a pit?
Sitting in a corner,
My cries echoed as I fall,
All my feelings evaporating like water,
Only to rain down on my later,
So heavy and make me fall…
Drench me, weigh me down and drag me on the ground,
All warmth gone again,
I though that I could get through,
But with wet clothes,
That soak in pain,
I cannot escape you…
Holding onto all I know,
But all I know is how hurt can grow,
I’ve looked in the mirrors,
Tried to see my eyes,
But whenever I see my face,
My eyes they lie,
The deceit,
They are not mine…
I’ve become darkness,
A shadow,
A nothing,
All the people leave me,
Not wanting the burden of my gloom,
So wearing all the soaking clothes,
I sit and cut alone,
In my room, as I rock on my chair
And repeat to myself its ok,
I hold the blade to my skin,
And drag it making all the pain go away,
But I feel the cold steel,
And in that feeling,
I know its real,
So my sweet friend,
What do you want from me?
I can give you all I am,
But nothing will be produced,
For I am worthless to the world,
You grow so strong,
And I’m standing still.
Always feeling so small,
I’m always feeling so ill,
Compared to the world,
I’m chucked in the bin,
And holding myself in a corner,
Weeping as I rock back and fourth,
And I feel,
I cut the world away,
And crimson tears leak my skin,
And as I sit alone here,
I hear and see the world within…
