Happiness

I'm sick of being unhappy,
I'm sick of being down.
I'm constantly looking for him,
but he is never around.

It's almost been two years,
and still nothing has changed.
The way I feel about him,
still remains the same.

While I've kept this secret,
I've been with two other guys.
I don't want to hurt anyone,
I really hate all of these lies.

So someone please tell me,
I really need to know.
Am I strong or am I weak?
and tell me how to let go.

A friend told me I would soon find happiness,
but I really don't think so.
My happiness has been and gone,
about two years ago.

*Plz comment*