Awwww.. that was very sweeet.. the only suggestions i can make to improve it are to make it into a poetry format.. try and seperate the paragraph in the right places and this will help readers.. also, you should not use words like "stuff" or "sucks", try and think of better words.. other than that, was very cute.. you used good descriptions, the rhymes worked and helped it flow well, and it was filled with emotion.. 5/5