Laughing as i cry

I'm laughing hysterically
while i sit here and cry
my hearts broken open
God.. i just wanna die
she watches in silence
a shine in her eye
its a shine that i put there
before she said goodbye
my mind runs in circles
it keeps asking why
and i cant breath without her
..thats why i don't sigh
this lack of oxygen
..well it makes me feel high
so i grin as i wonder
if it was all a lie
just manipulation
from a girl thinking shes sly
i know its not true
i don't even have to try
and tell myself its not
theres nothing to deny
i remember when i first saw her
how she made me act shy
i even remember
the first time i tickled her thigh
now she seems far away
even though shes nigh
and the world seems dark
without my firefly
my invisible bird
flying through the sky
though it sucks to be alone
theres no point in an ally
because they can be stolen
all you gotta do is pry
in the end death
is the only thing on which you can rely.