Father rained on our fairytale land

Heavenly father, come tuck me in my bed
And dry away the tears I’ve shed
Show me wonders I have not seen
Take me higher were I have not been

I long to feel the warmth that a father can bring
Him to enjoy my drawing and hearing me sing
I do so want a daddy, one to call my friend
But from his secret crimes, he shall never mend

I’m not sure I want to leave for eternity
But from what I want to forget is a certainty
Even when in my thoughts my breath is shaking
This man in my life is all of my aching

I wished he could have stayed that childhood sight
A big strong man that could only do right
pushing me on my childish garden swing
i remembered as we laughed,he was my big strong king

But this fairytale image began to fade
As my eyes were older i saw his true shade
To this i lost my worldly innocence when I saw
Mummy laying black and blue on the kitchen floor

she longed to witness the showers of family joy
from a husband meaning more than a violent boy
instead my mummy stayed quiet as a mouse
so the king would not rain bruises over our fairytale house

With the dining room chair he did so beat
I watched in shock, in tears, wet in my seat
With our tiny fingers we held her hand
While he rained pain over our fairytale land

So i was thinking, if I could not live everyday
I wouldn’t feel the aching too painful to say
Id forget his face and his knuckles for a time
Away from his hatred id be able to shine

I want to glance at the world from a star
Scratching of the pains, and leaveing them afar
I pray that you shall hold my hands
taking me dancing in your eternety sands