I tried....I really really really did. I tried to keep it away and I tried to keep it safe.
I promised forever. I promised I would stop forever...Never to cut myself just to see the blood, or never to because of my friends....Never to do it again because Someone doesn't care that I want to care. And I ended forever in a Month and Seventeen days.
Yes I cut again. No I didn't have a great reason. yes I had held it in for almost two months, yes my friends were doing it again, and yes everyone was just caving in around me. But no real reason....The love of my life..the only person who can ever make me feel great again, Didn't dump me or leave me or cheat on me. He didn't/hasn't abused me or ignored me. He didn't yell at me when I cut again. He didn't tell me i was a stupid dumb a** Like i wanted him to. He didn't tell me it wasn't OK like I wanted him to.
He sat there telling me it was OK. And that he still loved me and that I wasn't going to change that. And i really think that hes not lien. And that maybe for one time in my life...I've got...someone...something. But again. I still cut.
I know that I promised before and I cant do it now....I cant promise anyone. But I can try. I know that as long as I really try anyone who actually cares about me and loves me...Will stick next to me
I know that I'm in love and that people love me and care about me. So I've got to be done. I know its going to take time to stop. But i promise that in time. i will stop....FOREVER.......i CAN promise that.....
Thanks....to whoever read this...I just...need to and have to remember this....
