It Matters

I grab some paper,
I grab a pen,
I grab a blade,
As I began to write,
“Dear to who ever wants to listen,
Weather it would be family,
Weather it be friends,
If someone ever takes the time to read this,
If somebody even cares,
I just wrote this letter,
To give a hidden message you don’t know,
Or at least if you saw it no one was told,

I cried so many nights,
Walked all the lonely halls,
Was ignored for so long,
Sat in a corner all alone,
This probably won’t matter, to anyone,
But I felt someone should know.

I know no one loves me,
I know no one really notices me,
Which is why the next time,
You see me I’ll be dead,
It doesn’t matter to anyone,
Not my mom, not my dad,
Not my friends,
It doesn’t matter to anyone,
The loneliness I felt,
The tears that have fell,
My life that’s now gone,
Sincerely,
From me lonely.”

The paper I then take,
Place it on the counter,
Put back the pen,
Now it’s time,
For my life to end.

I take the blade and rest it on my skin,
My vision becomes bleary,
As some pressure I add,
The blade pierces my skin,
Sharp pain travels to my brain,
Blood dripping from my wrist,
I fall to my knees,
As I die there all alone.

My mom comes home,
See me laying their dead,
Screams in fear, screams in shock,
Cries so many tears,
Read the letter I left,
Passes it on to my family and friends.

So many here for me,
So many crying,
I just notices we all made mistakes,
They never saw I needed them,
I never asked,
They never saw the signs,
That I kept to myself.

I stood aside,
I watched them pass a paper around,
Everyone was crying,
I figured it was the letter I had wrote,
Then they lowered my body into the ground,
They all said a prayer,
Sniffing was the only sound,
Before they covered me with dirt,
A paper fell in,
It was a letter to me,
This is what it read,
“It Matters to ME!”
With everyone’s signature,
Showing their love for me.

It’s been 3 years and 7 weeks,
4 days and 20 hours,
5 minuets and 39 seconds and counting,
Since I had died, slit my wrist,
Since the grave stone was placed on top of me,
With loving letters, graved in stone,
That reads “It Matters to ME!”