Should She Do It?

She pointed the knife at her heart
As she ran out of excuses
Some people win at life
But she's the one that loses

This should have been done long ago
But she always chickened out
Now she's made up her mind
She'll do it without a doubt

She closes her eyes,
She grits her teeth
And thinks about how no one will know
The real girl underneath

Underneath those saddened, bloodshot eyes
And all the pale, scarred skin
Was a heart as pure as gold
But so many secrets, I don't know where to begin

She thinks about her mom
And the sad look on her face
Her mom was never there for her
She left without a trace

She thinks about her dad
Too drunk to do anything anymore
All he does it sit on the couch
And leaves her with all the chores

She thinks about her sister
Too young to understand
She prays, 'Please, God,
let her be happier than I am.'

She thinks about her boyfriend
The only thing she has
He doesn't know how bad she is
But he should know she wouldn't last

The world is full of hatred
It's a very cold, hard place
You can't have any weaknesses
Some have to look death in the face

She lets out a sigh of sadness
And plunges it into her chest
Today every part of that girl died
But she thought it was for the best.

Rachel Crombie--2//25//05