Stealing me

I said I'd never let this happen
But once again I can't get away
Why have I fallen when I made a promise
It should never have turned out this way
I don't love anymore
I fell as though I am all alone
Not knowing who to talk too
Not wanting to be on my own
I am not who I used to be
If I could change myself I would
I am not the same anymore
I really feel I should
Stop cutting myself evey night and day
Because it lets me get out
Stop hiding the truth far away
When I want to scream and shout
Do you care about me enough
Do you need me here all the time
I think about you, that you know
I drive my blade down the line
I write these poems for no-one at all
I stumble and cry every night
Poems are my way of expressing myself
When I feel as though my life is shite
I lie alone in the darkness now
As my hurting turns to hate
I feel so angry at the world
As I watch my loved ones taken
I want to kill people, so that they can
Finally understand
All I ever wanted was happiness
A friend to hold my hand
But gone are the days when I cared about me
Those days they no longer exist
I do not want to be alive anymore
And so I am telling you this
I love you more than anything else
I wish that you felt the same way
I hate this world we are living in
And yet I live for you everyday
But I'm weaker now, I need your support
And this is my last cry for help
I can't carry the weight of the world anymore
I can't take living in this hell
I'm crying out to you at last
I need you to answer my call
I cannot take being on my own
I need you to be there when I fall
Look at the state of me Messed up, in agony
Turning to drugs for escape
This is not who I want to be
A hole in my life, now does gape
I am turning against this world
I am holding the knife in my arms
Yelling out in my anger with this
Darkness revealed in my harm
Plotting deeds that you can barely imagine
Writing them down in my book
And if you ever then managed to find it
I doubt that you would be able to look....