I wrote this before my boyfriend and I went out...enjoy...
I sit in the corner of my room while
tears go down my cheeks like race cars
and all that goes through my mind is:
I want to die...
Pain is overwhelming me,
all I do is break down and cry.
I cant take it anymore.
If one more thing goes wrong,
Poof, I'm gone.
But then again as the tears slow down...
as if they reached a red light,
Theres you.
You have told me you couldn't live without me.
You have told me how much I mean to you.
But baby, I must not live on.
If it would help, forget about me.
Move on with your life,
While i move down.
Tears move a little faster.
My eyes burn.
I picture you in my mind and begin to shake,
as I hear your voice flow throughout my mind;
in a calm but sorrowful melody:
"You're right I wouldn't be able to live without you.
Just think, if you ended your life,
I'd end mine.
I need you. I love you, and I wouldn't be able to live without you, too.
So don't even tell me to forget about you and move on."
Tears once again slow down and the last of them jumps off my chin,
as if committing their own suicide by jumping off a cliff.
I realize...as my suicidal thoughts slow to a stop, that you really do
love and need me.
And I realize why I'm still living.
Why I didn't commit so long ago,
is because of
you.
Is because,
I live my life for you.
and,
ONLY YOU.
I wipe my eyes and smile, the picture of you floating around in my mind.
I cant wait to kiss you
and for you to hold me tight.
Also, I cant wait to be your girlfriend.
and to start our romantic relationship with
smiles, hugs, kisses, laughter
but most of all true happiness.
so just for you,
I will hold on
and keep going.
just for you,
I will change my mind,
just for you i will stay alive.
Only for you i live my life...
