My Past

When I think of my past,
Tears start to form in my eyes,
The life I once lived,
I can know leave be hind,

I thought I'd have no more time to cry,
No more time to cause harm,
But I was wrong so very wrong,
You can tell just by looking at my arm,

Everyone thinks I'm getting better,
Probably because I tell them I'm alright,
But I know it’s a lie,
For every moment on this earth I fight,

To live this day and age,
May be a dream come true for some,
But for me it’s an everlasting depression,
Something I wish did not come,

Cutting is my release for the pain I feel,
Although all I really get are permanent marks,
From the past and present they still lye,
From a life so unlivable cold and dark.

©Samantha Jayne Reed
Wrote on February 28th, 2005