Pushing the pain

I put the razor to my skin
All I can think about is the pain that I am about to put upon myself
As i slide it across my skin I feel a sting
Then the blood comes
it soothes me
I do it over and over
The pain is gone
All i can see now is the blood
I keep cutting
I push harder on my skin with the blade
To push the pain
How far can i go?
How much longer until the blood just stops?