My knife

There it is sitting on my bed
A cold voice talking inside my head
Telling me to cut again
Saying it will ease my pain

Guiding me over to my knife
Guiding my arms as I take my life
Pulling the point closer to the vein
Making me drowsy and cold again

Lying me down to sleep at night
Even there I cannot escape my fright
Waking up in a cold, cold sweat
Back to the darkness I want to get

Seeing it mutilating my arms
Just another kid who likes to self harm
Thats what I am all I'll ever be
This is not who I want to be me

Buying the sweets, from my local shop
Filled up with sugar, I eat till I pop
Not caring about the weight I'm putting on
Not caring about it till the sweets are gone

Then comes the guilt flooding over me
I am a sorry sight to see
Look like I mess and I feel it too
Wanting to cut myself in the solitary loos

The mirror shows me the bags under my eyes
All red and puffy from the last time I cried
I turn away from the horrible reflection
I am again locked away in depression