Another night of fighting,
The fear of my Mom sends me in my room hiding.
I don't even know what I do,
I guess her hatred for me grew.
In my Moms eyes my sister is perfect,
But I'm the "family" misfit.
Every bad thing that happens is my fault,
My Mom tells me to grow up and be an adult.
I try and try so hard,
But when she gets mad it catches me off guard.
She'll scream and hit,
She reminds me of a little kid when she throws a fit.
Afterwards she'll cry and say she knows what she did was wrong,
But everything that has been happening to her she has been holding in for so long.
She apologizes tonight,
But I know this wont be our last fight.
I don't want to go suicidal again,
Go back to where this all began.
I could just watch the blood pour from my wrists,
That would give me pure bliss.
I would get lightheaded and dizzy,
No one would even notice because they are all too busy.
I could fall to the ground and die,
Then maybe someone would notice my life was full of lies.
For now I'll continue like I'm fine,
But everyone will figure everything out in a matter of time...
