My First love without really loving

When I saw you
I saw you;
When you looked at me
You didn't look at me;
you looked at the
person next to me
you never saw me for me
just her for her body;
why couldn't you love me
instead but was it really love
or was it just another fantasy
i wont know;
either will she
but i want to tell you
i don't love you anymore;
i don't know if i ever really did
i saw something inside you most people don't i saw you
i saw the boy i fell in love with
the boy that held me close
the boy that told me lies
and took off my clothes
the boy i will never want to share
the boy i deeply care for even
when your not there
the boy that took my breath away
the boy that was my everything
the Boy that told me he loved me
but didn't want to
be with me everyday
the boy i thought i loved
the boy that stole my heart and wouldn't give it back
the boy i dreamed with when i didn't want to go back
why would this boy tell me i was his first love but he
doesn't really love me
why would he hurt me like this without even a care
i don't know; either does he but i know theres a lot more
fish in the sea
but that boy took me to places never thought to be that boy was my man and i loved him dearly

please comment thanks i just wrote this note out of the clear blue no reason