Whats happened?

What is happening to me?
i can not control it anymore...
the knife comes out and i have no say anymore
i don't want to do it
but it just happens
i tell myself no but my body does not listen to me
it is like my body has forgotten about me like everyone else
it is like nothing i say matters
I am scared...for all i know it could get worse
tomorrow i could be lieing in a ditch dead for all i know,
but I am not scared of dieing...I am scared of living
i wish someone would come and guide me...listen to me
be there for me
but no-one wants to know me I am just the little girl in the Corner
with no friends...no feelings...no life...