First loves

First Loves
by Lola step

We were so caught up- in the way only young lovers can be
or like older folks trying to recapture their youth
it was that wild, free spirit that kept us going
that lust for life which seems to fade as you get older

but we brought it out in each other- in the best, nicest way possible
He was like my "one" in that innocent sweet schoolgirl's
first-crush kind of way
Like when you were younger and you had a crush
on that guy who sat behind you

he used to pull on your pigtails and chase you around
You'd scream how much you hated him
as you pushed him down in the yard
and you thought you did hate him
because he seemed to hate you

You'd talk about him constantly,
how you wished he'd leave you alone
the day he did, the day the pigtails he pulled weren't yours,
...you were crushed

heartbroken in that, "I hate him so why do I feel so bad...
ooh ice cream, I feel better now" kind of way
And, though, we were much older
than the hopscotch and sticky hands days
He was like my double scoop of rainbow sherbet
...when I felt bad

Although innocence always dies as time goes on and birthdays pass
We had this innocent charm that surrounded us
oh, but we had passion for each other, too
we were as young as two older people could be
the need for fun kept us alive

It was like laughing with your childhood best friend
over inside jokes- or everything or nothing...

I didn't meet him till all of my childhood days
were a long gone memory
still, he was like a youthful companion from my elementary days
We had love for each other- but we didn't have staying power

We'd be together, then we'd be apart... and so on
and each heartbreak was worse than the one before
(As it always is... growing up)
like it is for an adolescent girl who falls in love all the time
thinking she'll never feel that way again
she probably says and feels that more than 40 times in her life
...and she means it every time

He was like my first car, at 16
the excitement of something new takes over
and you want to see it everyday
you want to see everything it has to offer, everything inside
You never forget your first car... or your first love

your first "doodle his name on every paper" love,
first "boy I can never have" love,
the first "high school, grownup" love,
first "this is love?" love,
your first "Kay, the other ones don't count- this is real" love,
the first "He loves me, too!" love...

You never forget any of them, just like I can't forget him
He's on my list of all time favorite loves
and, though, the kisses in the rain and the fun games we played are gone
and every thing's a distant memory in the past,
I might never again find someone who I can be young and innocent with

So, I'm better with him, He's the one in that-
"we'll never be together again but it's always there" kind of way
So, I'll never forget my first...
"made me feel alive and really in love" love