Hey mom look at me

Hey mom look at me
I'm gone now
its not all your fault
I'm just mad at what you did and didn't do
now in this free style poem i will tell you

hey mom look at me
i know you tried your hardest and the best that you could do
you have no idea how much i appreciate that
no idea
instead you just blame me for only thinking of myself
when in reality
i hardly ever think of me

Hey mom look at me
I'm growing up and theres nothing you can do about it
don[t try to guilt me out of anything anymore
the tears and the anger doesn't work anymore
I'm through
I'm gone
I'm done with this so called life

hey mom look at me
I'm no longer afraid of what you and dad have to say
I'm basically an only child
might as well be
i have always been afraid of disappointing you and dad
now I'm not because i know that the only person i now care about disappointing is me
just me
you can both cry, scream, get mad or whatever
because i no longer care
I'm through caring about only you and this screwed up family's problems
now its only mine and my best friends
maybe even a little bit of the family
but not that much i can promise

hey mom look at me
i made a promise
this is when you say your gonna do something and then you do it
just in case you or dad were wondering
I'm sick of your lies
your tears
I'm sick of my tears
for the love of god when are you going to give up on this
I'm not stupid
i know when your lying i always find out remember
you might as well tell me everything before i find out and get even more pissed off at you

hey mom look at me
for real
this whole thing about you and Dad still being together after all these years after all he's done to you
thats right i remember walking in and seeing you 2 pushing and yelling at each other
i remember hearing you scream out no
i remember you trying to leave and when you got out you always went back
i remember
i remember that mean lady in Lawton that me and Dad stayed with
i guess lived with
her long ugly hair
her even more spoiled than me son
that ugly house that smelled
the mattress on the floor i slept in next to their bed that could fit all four of us in
i remember
that you let that all happen
i didn't want to go with him and you couldn't see that

hey mom look at me
i was just wondering
how does it feel that your only son moved out because of the man you married
and how does this feel
knowing that your only daughter knows everything and is now writing this as an only way for you to understand
all the fake divorce threats are coming back to me
i remember all of them
i still can't believe you stayed with him all that time
yea he's my father and i love him but then again i hate him
i love you but then again i can't believe you

hey mom look at me
i left now I'm gone
I'll come back
maybe then you'll understand
maybe then you'll know the feeling of not having someone you love there
maybe then you'll know that i wasn't LYING when i said i was sick of all of this
maybe now you know that I'm a what you could call free spirit
I'm no longer afraid of leaving
I'll do it again
if you don't start listening and maybe start telling me the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth
you know those words pretty well don't you

hey mom look at me
i can't quit now I'm on a roll
after working where you did you didn't see the signs of what my father was doing to you
yea thats right daddy i know everything
about the weed
about the lies
about everything
i know
you can't change that no matter how hard you try
no matter what you do
I'm gone
I'm done
I'm through