Waiting To Die

My eyes are longing, waiting to cry,
But the tears always seem to well up and die,
And as hard as my mind screams at me,
I want so badly to let go of everything.

I have no conscience, it’s been ignored,
But in my head it shouts galore, and,
With every silent scream it makes,
I fall into the middle of another mistake.

But look around, you’ll finally see,
That deep inside the mistake is me.
No significance in all I have done,
And for that, my tears have all ready won.

They’re pouring out, crimson red,
But no one can see how much I have bled.
My body cries out, mind, heart, and soul,
But nothing can make this dead body whole.

The love of my life, my best friend,
Is keeping me from reaching the end,
The end of all this hidden strife, which,
With one quick slice, could end with a knife.

Megan Schroeder 2005

Sometimes I’m not sure whether to love you, or hate you for keeping me here.