Mom doesnt love me

I swallow my anger, tears and words; and I feel like the loneliest kid in the world, I feel like I have no mother, no sanctuary to protect me, no honest shoulder to cry on and no god to comfort me.

Why can't she just love the real me, so I can stop pretending to be someone I'm not.

In a perfect world nobody would of hurt her, and she would realize how much she hurts me. But this is not a perfect world, it's not.................

When she's ready I will show her my true image-

a girl with all the softness of a porcelain doll in her face

yet with all the intimidation of heaven in her stare.

with dreams and memories of forgotten prophecies in her eyes;

and all the hope in her smile.

with hands that can paint beautiful glamors, and open every door.

A girl who lives in purple, and breathes in love

who will spread her wings to the world and say I am not a monsters just because I can love both a boy or a girl.

Until then she only sees me in black and white.