Giving Up

I've given up
Finally it's true
I know it's for real
Because I don't want to feel
Not anymore
I want it all gone

I know it's for real
That I really want no pain
No feelings at all
Because right now there is nothing
And before when this happened
I would scare and cut for feeling
But tonight I didn't want to
Because I liked being empty
So I stayed away from the blade

Don't think of this
As some sort of accomplishment
It's far from that
It's me wanting nothing
It's me feeling nothing
It's me wanting freedom
From everything in this world

Is this suicide
That's been crossing my mind?
I can't be sure
I'm so confused lately
About everything in my life
But if it is
Then I'm closer than ever
Closer to wanting no emotions
Closer to being totally empty
And not wanting to be saved

Try to think of a way
For me to go back
And be happy again
While I'm still open up
To any suggestions you have
Because I can feel myself closing
To any form of help
And soon enough
It will be too late for me