How Can This Ever Change?

- Feeling lost and confused

How can it hurt…every day…when I don’t feel the pain?
How can it ever change or heal… when I still look the same?

How can you try to fight the core, when it’s the enemy you can’t see?
How can you feel it…deep inside…when it’s invisible to me?

How can this ever change for good, when the pain inside’s engraved?
How can a life… really work, when suicide has been craved?

I keep looking round inside this space, inside this tortured mind
Only to find that perfect answers, have now been left behind

And now despair keeps raining down, upon my pale cheeks
How long have I felt like this you ask? 4 years, 4 months, 3 weeks

And what if…what if I did it now; I know I’d be discrete…
I could make it so that nobody knows; I could make an attempt complete

It could be so easy to just let go…to just slip away right now
I wish I could stop these pestering thoughts, but I really don’t know how

I won’t call myself a broken angel, an angel I’ve never been
I’ve always been a meaningless soul, deserved to be left unseen

And the ground beneath is the only thing, that’s always there for sure
People come and go like clouds, raining memories to store

But this pain, this despair, it NEVER passes, over my darkened sky
Always raining, it won’t seem to move, and I keep wondering why…

I know its not my best but ah well, thank you for reading x