I've tried to forget
all my tears and brokenness
but the memory of
your twisted definition of love
still holds me down
knowing you're still around
i can't seem to find a way
to let go of yesterday
I've tried to forget the day you made me write
my own fake suicide note
but I'll never forget the feeling of your stone cold hands wrapping that wire around my throat
Ive tried to forget the purple color of my hands
when you were tightly gripping my wrist
but afterwords you made it all better
with one gentle kiss
but no matter how hard i try
that color wont fade from my mind
you never cared when i screamed
you'd cover my mouth with whatever
you never cared about how scared i was
whenever we were alone together
every time i tried to push away
you held on so much stronger
and every time i uttered a sound
you'd beat me that much longer
when it got to more than hitting
and you started sexually abusing me
i had to get away from you
i had to break myself free
over and over everyday
the reality became numbing
i feared living and waking each day
knowing what what was coming
every time you got me on the ground
and i was to weak to fight
you'd Kiss me, bittersweet
to make me believe everything was right
for so long you kept me from living
and being who i could have been
but through this all Ive learned
i can never love you again
i thought i could conquer everything
even the images of you
and i cant figure out why i cant let go
no matter what i do
maybe because everyday i see you
i stare back into your glaring eyes
maybe it's because every time i think of you
i cant help but to cry
maybe it's because we're set apart
we're so much smarter than the rest
through everything we've done together
we've always come out best
maybe it's because there was once true love
something pulling us through
maybe it's because we're going through life side by side
but I'm not really with you
someday I'll get over you
someday I'll let you go
someday I'll be able to live
and there will be nothing of you to show
