My Silent Screams (C)

* Hope this inspires you all, and helps you understand what I'm all about, please vote and comment, it would mean alot...thnx xx *

I don't know the meaning of life
I don't know how to cope
I don't know how to deal with emotions
And I don't know how to hope

I gave up hope and faith
I gave it all up when I was young
The day that I got raped
Was the day, I was no longer strong

I tried so hard to be " Miss Perfect"
I tried so hard to make you proud
I gave it up when you lost hope
I scream and it's like there is no sound

When it comes to hearing something
That you just don't want to hear
You turn your back on me
Ignore me like I'm not even here

You gave up faith, so why can't I?
When I'm the one suffering depression
You're the one who's always shouting
The one who shows me nothing but aggression

I feel like there's something
Always missing in my life
I've had no god dam luck
I've coped for years all by my self

But now I'm giving up
Because it's getting harder to fake the smiles
I'm giving up on love and hope
The pain is not worth while

So you keep on ignoring
Keep on blanking out my fears
Because I won't be dying of old age
I'll suceed in killing my self one of these years

You didn't know about my rape
You didn't know of my pain
But two years of getting over it
I got raped yet again

Not by the same person
Not that you would care
Why do you act like you can't see me?
Like I'm not even there!

So thanks again for letting go
And giving up on me
I could never be the perfect daughter
The one you wanted me to be

And yes I'm covered in piercings
And yes one day I'll get tattoos
But isn't that my choice?
It's not for you to choose

You wanted a little angel
But instead you got a depressed girl
Sorry about that but it won't happen
My halo I gave away at birth

So once again I'll say sorry
And you can keep on comparing me
You can say I'm not like the rest
Of my f u c k e d up family

You can say you just don't no
You can say " No more piercings"
I've heard it all before
You just say the same old things

You can keep on saying I'm not like others
I shouldn't sit and shout
But who's the one who brought me up
And ignored the pain I've felt

So once again you've won
Even though that you might not believe
I'll just keep on smiling
So you I can deceive

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