Where did I go

Where did I go
Why am I so sad
How did I get this way
I hate not knowing who I am
I don't recognize who is in the mirror
But I know its my worst enemy
Y do I cry myself to sleep at night
yet smile everyday
Why do I lie and steal
Why do I cut
how come I want to die
What happened
I used to love life
Now I just want it to end
Will the pain ever stop
When am I going to be happy
I don't like to be sad
I wish I could smile and laugh
Just like I used to
I want know that love is real
I wish I knew where god went
He disappeared when I grew ;up
Look into my eyes
Can you see any happiness
Or do you just see what I see
A scared, sad, lost, girl
Do you know who I really am
Do you know where I went
I didn't think so
Maybe someday I wont be scared
Maybe I'll look into the mirror
And maybe just maybe
Someday I'll remember!!!!

*this poem is kinda confusing cause I wrote it when I was very lost in life and was looking for an answer from anybody.